Ironically my very first part time job was in a popular high street health and beauty store within the make-up and fragrance section. Now I say that is ironic, purely because I myself am prone to a beauty fail or two (or 1,782) and the fact that I was advising the general public on “beauty” was quite simply a disaster waiting to happen. Don’t get me wrong, I am very much a girly girl – I love getting dressed up and doing my hair and make up – but I am FAR from being a natural at it. In the last year alone I have had some of the most epic beauty fails possible. Examples to follow in a second.
In every family or group of friends there’s normally different types of women, right? There’s the one who has watched enough YouTube make-up tutorials that they could give any famous make-up artist a run for their money. There’s the one that somehow manages to paint her right hand as well as her left hand when painting nails (something I will never be able to get my head around). There’s the one who has every single lotion and potion you could ever need. There’s the one that can curl her own hair. There’s the holy grail, the one that can French pleat her own hair. Then, there’s me. I am none of those girls. When I get ready with my friends for a night out, all I’m trusted with is pouring the wine!
Right, now to tell you about some of those beauty fails I mentioned. Let’s first rewind to Spring last year when I had a wedding to attend in the north of Spain with friends. I decided to try out some fake tan on my legs, as I didn’t want to have to wear tights. I didn’t have any latex gloves to put the fake tan on with, so I tried to improvise and somehow thought a Ziploc sandwich bag over each hand would do the job….it did not. I repeat, it did NOT. Patchy or streaky don’t even begin to describe what my legs looked like. I somehow managed to achieve a striped, chevron effect. Needless to say I ended up going to the wedding with bright red legs after scrubbing them so much to get back to “normal”.
Now my next example happened only just a month ago, proving I don’t ever learn from my mistakes. I didn’t have time to drop in to my usual beautician, so decided I should attempt to quickly tidy up my eyebrows myself while getting ready to go to brunch with friends. I rummaged about in my bathroom cupboard to find some of those “easy to use” wax strips you can buy in stores as they seemed easy enough to use if even the box said so. I did the left eyebrow first, not perfect, but good enough end result. Then…I got cocky. I wacked the next strip onto the right eyebrow WHILE brushing my teeth at the same time. BAD MOVE! I pulled the strip off after a minute or so and continued to brush my teeth. But out of the corner of my eye, I saw the wax strip I had just used…with half of my eyebrow on it! I was terrified to look in the mirror, and when I finally did, my worst fears were confirmed – I had accidentally waxed off the outside half of my right eyebrow. I honestly think my poor right eyebrow might be the only thing on the planet that is thankful for the lockdown situation – a chance to regrow without all the funny looks!
What made me think of these stories today? Well as much as we’re all aware of the severity of the current COVID-19 situation, we can’t help but think about how our basic beauty regimes have gone out the window, am I right? Roots are growing out, grey hairs are growing in, fringes are growing into eyes, Shellac manicures are half way up our nails by now and there are monobrows galore!
Hairdressers, beauticians, nail technicians – you guys are the unsung heroes behind every outfit we choose and every picture posted on Instagram. We miss you and appreciate you more than ever!